Recently, a commenter said something that indicated confusion about
what Alpha and beta status is. Because these terms are so commonly misused or used as insults or compliments in the wrong context, I thought it wise to clear things up. Readers of this site should not be confused.
Alpha is a term in biology that is used to describe the one who is the highest ranking in a particular group. He or she is the one the others defer to, and he has the greatest access to the group’s resources. This individual can be male or female. The alpha female is not necessarily
the counterpart of the alpha male. Some animals, such as the hyena, have an alpha female, and no alpha male. Male hyenas rank lower than the lowest ranking female by default. Some animals have what’s called an alpha pair, and they share dominance over their group.
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In what I believe is the best instruction manual for social interaction ever, Games People Play
, Dr. Eric Berne describes three levels of Rapo, and the Frigid Woman games.
Rapo is basically a social game in which someone lures another to pursue
them sexually, takes some pleasure (ego boost) from it, and then dismisses
their target. Level 1 ends with the target/sucker being politely dismissed after they commit to pursuit (You’re nice but…). Level 2 ends with the sucker being dismissed by shaming (Buzz off buster!). Level 3 ends very messy and violently with the sucker being lured into physical contact, then being accused of a criminal assault (Rape!).
The Frigid Woman game is basically the marital or committed relationship
version of Rapo. The sucker is lured and then shamed to feed the player’s ego.
These games are normally viewed as the domain of women, so men are usually raised with awareness of the possibility of being accused of sexual harassment or rape. Women though, are often caught unawares when a man plays a similar game. Where sex is the lure with the female Rapo player, love is the lure with the male player. The games begin with the player successfully seducing his target into thinking of him as a romantic prospect. (more…)
Scoring with an Alpha type male means being recognized as someone
he could become sentimentally attached to regardless of other sexual or
romantic partners. Sorry girls, but you will be unable to gain
monogamy from a social-Alpha male whether he is an Alpha type, or a higher
beta in an Alpha position. You may be able to gain monogamy from
a more introverted Alpha type male or an Alpha positioned male if he chooses
this for reasons of his own personal health or sanity, but it’s not actually
you earning it. It’s his choosing it for himself. Be aware
that one of the reasons he may choose it is because the other woman or
women he is sentimentally attached to, will not have sex with him.
You are not and will never be his “everything”. (more…)
Scoring, or “closing the deal” is different for women than it is for
men. Since the male PUA basically ignores the different types of
women and the actual reality of what they can and do get away with, for them, it means getting laid. For the female PUA it means being taken seriously. It’s getting to the point where you’ve captured the guy’s interest as more than a shag. The sex is sometimes a means to that end, but it is not the real challenge. It probably should be the same for men, but we live in a time when far too women are materialistic and shallow themselves, so the pool of candidates that are not interchangeable is smaller than it used to be.
In order to increase the effectiveness of your game (not deception, just slang for social interaction in a romantic context), after knowing what kind of man it is you want, and knowing what kind of man you’re dealing with, you want to know what scoring with him means. (more…)
